here comes the sun

here comes the sun

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here comes the sun
here comes the sun
I'm scared.

I'm scared.

On acknowledging the hard things.

Ashleigh Vaughn's avatar
Ashleigh Vaughn
Apr 07, 2025
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here comes the sun
here comes the sun
I'm scared.
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Written some time last month, I’m not updating it to the past tense because it still stands.

It’s currently 12:22 am, and I’ve just popped my Trazadone. Terribly late, I’m not supposed to take it after ten. But I don’t have anything to do tomorrow but pack and clean, so it’s okay if I sleep in. I also took my Vyvanse this morning so that I could focus on purging and cleaning today, so I’m a little too awake for it to be after midnight.

I was just thinking, “Ah, I need a paid post for the month.” So, I put down my iPad, where I’m currently reading from, picked up my Macbook, and started this draft.

Sadness has been a constant this week.

Up until last week, the prominent emotions about my move were excitement and anticipation. But the closer I get to the 28th, the more I hang out with my people, and the emptier my place gets, the more sadness creeps up. I’ve cried so much this week. I know this move is temporary, but I’m going to miss my chosen family in the DMV.

I am also scared…

Paid subscribers, keep scrolling to continue reading.


Currently.

Feeling — A bit anxious, a tinge of sadness, slightly… numb?

Reading — “Getting to Happy” it’s the sequel to “Waiting to Exhale.”

Listening — I just finished “The House of My Mother” and man, I can’t image such an existence.

Anticipating — The R&S writing retreat is next week, and it is also my birthday!

Contemplating — How not to crash out if they go with someone else.

Affirming — I will be okay.


Similar to this.

Posts of mine with a similar vibe:

  • My heart is heavy but my ass is still fat.

  • Crying on dates and job interviews.

  • To mentally ill Black girls who feel alone.


Thank you for reading ‘here comes the sun.’

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