This essay houses my gay agenda.
On encouraging the increased representation the LGBTQIA+ community in media and society.
“I’m just all about people having the right to exist and live, that the only agenda I’m pushing.” - Angela Yee
Queer People: exists
World: STOP FORCING YOUR LIFESTYLE ON US! THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN!
This essay originally started as a rant this time last year. It was prompted by Gracie’s Corner, a popular kids' YouTube show that creates rhythmic remixes to popular nursery rhymes. Last year, they dropped a bounce remix to their popular rendition of “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” and who other than the Queen of Bounce herself, Big Freedia, should guest star? While the comments on their YouTube videos are always turned off, a rule for all children’s content, people wasted no time jumping into their comments on other social sites to share their disdain for the decision to include the androgynous star. Frequently among the comments was some semblance of a popular sentiment that most people who are anti-gay use, “not y’all, too? they’re pushing the gay agenda hard on our children!”
I can’t adequately describe the visceral reaction my body experiences as a result of hearing or seeing someone talk about “the gay agenda.” I genuinely wanted to know what people thought the agenda was, and who does it benefit? I polled my Facebook friends, knowing I would get very few answers, about what it is they think the gay agenda is. I wanted to ask people I knew instead of strangers on the internet to reduce the chances of hearing the same rhetoric and talking points—or worse—as the “not racist but not happy about all the increased BIPOC representation in the media.”
One of the few answers I received in response (typos have been corrected):
I feel that pushing the gay agenda on our kids means, that our kids will see the same sex together more openly now and there is more gay relationships seen on tv more than ever. And back in the day you really didn’t see it, it wasn’t as open and out there as it is now. And it’s on kids shows and people feel that just let our kids see men and women couples not same sex couples all over the tv. It’s like kids take in so much at a young age and some parents/people just don’t want their kids seeing it. I can understand it. Like the show Uncle Grandpa? I was like what? Just from the name of the show. Some people will never be ok with gay people and that’s ok it’s their choice.
I honestly don't think most people who make the claim of an apparent agenda can articulate what that agenda is. I wish, instead of claiming that there is some sort of sinister plan aimed at harming our children, folks would just get comfortable telling the truth and saying "I don't like/agree with this and don't want my kids to either or am not ready/don't want to talk about it with them." Because the gay agenda is just “increased representation of LGBTQIA+ in the media to make our kids think being gay is okay?” And my question is, what’s so wrong with that?
Increased representation, inclusion, and depictions of people in the LGBTQIA+ community leads to a more tolerable future for the community. Folks just want to live freely without hatred and harm and want to see themselves in the world they’re forced to be apart of. And since we can't get through to the adults, maybe just maybe we can help the kids be more tolerable by increasing representation in their media as well. And if speaking against this agenda is truly about protecting children from some intentionally harmful agenda, why aren't the LGTBQIA+ youth included in that protection? Why does their sexuality disqualify them from your concern?
According to The Trevor Project’s 2023 U.S. National Survey on the Mental Health of LGBTQ Young People:
41% of LGBTQ young people seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year.
56% of LGBTQ young people who wanted mental health care in the past year were not able to get it.
A majority of LGBTQ young people reported being verbally harassed at school because people thought they were LGBTQ.
Nearly 1 in 3 LGBTQ young people said their mental health was poor most of the time or always due to anti-LGBTQ policies and legislation.
“I don’t believe in homosexuality, it’s not natural.”
What grinds my gears about people saying “I don’t believe in homosexuality” as apart of their instead of “homosexuality makes me uncomfortable because I’ve been taught that it’s wrong” is the fact that we see evidence of variation in almost all aspects of humanity and nature otherwise. All species have differences in size, shape, color, form and ability. And humans especially differ in morality, personality traits, mental and physical capacity and ability. Yet and still people believe that sexuality is the ONLY thing creation said “nope, only one form of this, no other variants” to.
My gay agenda is..
I’m glad that there is an increase in LGBTQIA+ representation in society and the media. Just like I celebrate the increased representation of Black and brown people. Increased representation leads to more tolerant, aware, and kinder generations. It leads to less people being unhappy their entire lives married to or trying to relate to a man they hate when they really want to be with their female best friend. It leads to fewer men living on the “down low” because everyone expects him to have a wife. But let’s focus on the children here.
I knew at an early age that I was not straight but when you grow up in a church where your pastor talks about “sissies,” often and your First Lady tells you it’s not right for women to have sex with each other “because the pieces don’t fit.” You learn that you have to keep your mouth shut. Your silence in exchange for your mental and emotional security. To ensure you’re not constantly reminded that you’re going to hell for all of eternity because the man in the sky made you emotionally and sexually attracted to folks who may or may not have the same genitalia as you while also telling folks he hates it.
While I am not asking for the world to accept or believe in things that they are convinced they should not, I am asking for you not to allow those beliefs to impose upon others' rights to live unapologetically and safely (as long as they are not harming others while doing so) and be represented. Everyone will not believe what we do, have the same convictions that we do, interpret historical text in the way that we do and they do not deserve to be hated, bullied, suppressed, or killed because they simply want to live in the fullness of their humanity.
I think I’m heading into preaching territory if I wasn’t already there. I, personally, am exhausted by trying to beg folks to see the humanity of others and to allow for that humanity to sometimes trump their belief systems when it means keeping people, mostly the children they claim to want to protect, alive.
My gay agenda is to give hope to the scared gay child who doesn’t see a future for themselves or a way out of whatever toxic environment they’re growing up in. To keep them from constantly being at war with themselves and how they were created.
My gay agenda is to affirm other queer black women like me who yearn to live and love openly and freely without warring with themselves.
My gay agenda is to encourage the representation of the vast array of individuals who make up the LGBTQIA+ community whether you know they are or not.
My gay agenda is to live a life that allows others to feel like they don’t have to “come out,” or “stay in” for that matter.
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I’ve observed that children are often more welcoming of the world’s differences when they are allowed to simply engage with the representation of it (instead of framing it from a lens of them being “exposed” to it). I personally observe this in having a daughter living with a disability. The adults that work with her are typically less compassionate than her elementary school peers. The adults are encouraging some level of conformity while her friends are more compassionate and sensitive to who she is. Children have their opinions just like everyone else but that opinion can still be rooted in empathy and respect for others. And without the judgmentally persuasive banter, it usually is. That is the beauty in what authentic representation can give us. A more compassionate, less judgmental, and beautifully diverse society.
“Kids” truly have become the scapegoat for anything that ruffles the feathers of anyone looking to preserve their traditional views. Thank you for sharing this with us.
This is beautiful and necessary. Thank you.