42 Comments

I feel seeeeen. I always wonder how the elders/aunts be knowin, 😭 even if they’re just making assumptions based on heteronormativity. You and the lighting in your photos are gorgeous. Thank you for sharing 🩷

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Lol they just be knowing but I was not yet ready to tell! Thank you so much!

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Ohh Ashleigh I have a very similar experience 🤭. I've known since about junior high that I liked girls but settled with boys/men bc it seemed more acceptable in my family. My bestfriends knew since high school. I came out to my mother as bi when I was about 25 and to my surprise she told me she kinda figured and she's cool with it. She has siblings that are gay and it doesn't bother her. Then I told my stepmom and my grandmother. They're ok with it too. Even told my husband before we got married. Thank you for sharing another wonderful blog! 🖤🌻

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Ahh Alex, thank you for sharing this with me. There are so many of us out there, especially in hetero-appearing relationships.

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Big claps for the ending: I don’t know what sex my forever partner will be, or even if there will be one, but I’m glad that I’ve given myself the opportunity to be open to whatever identity that forever love happens to be.

Good on you for owning and allowing us to see you in the same radiant light you hold your self in.

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Thank you love! I felt all warm and fuzzy, light and free with that line!

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I still feel it sometimes. I only just came out. Here. Lmao. I’m literally still one foot in the closet. Scared about who all gon read this. Who all gon see me. Who all gon stay.

I read this and I cried a lot. Beautiful prose. Beautiful photos. Beautiful piece.

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Like only just came out right here in this comment or elsewhere on Substack?! Lol either way, congratulations! Whether one person knows, or the whole world, it is worth celebrating! Thank you so much for sharing with me.

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Elsewhere on substack but not more loudly on the wider internet and with specific family members

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Jun 15Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

Dann that title !!!!!!!!!!

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I loved it!

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Jun 15Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

First of all those beautiful portraits !!!!! Wow 🤩 stunning. And thank you for being so open and sharing. The title is SO powerful.

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Thank you so so very much!!

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Jun 15Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

I saw the title in my inbox this morning and read it as I enjoyed my morning coffee…. And that is the vibe— This piece was a balm to me. 🖤🌻

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Aww, shucks. Rose. You have SUCH a way with words.. yes, BALM!

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This is beautiful, Ashleigh. Thank you for sharing🧡

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Thank you A, I appreciate you!

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Jun 15Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

My heart!!! Thank you. Always amazing to see someone else articulate so many of the thoughts in my own head.

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I so love those moments of "omg, same!" Thank you for reading!

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Jun 15Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

This is beautiful and so honest. It's so powerful. I'm trying to break out if the forcing myself to be with a man thing right now. Thank you for sharing this 🙏

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Thank you so much! I get that, and I hope one day you feel the release of that force!

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I’m so so happy for you! I’ve only known of you for a few months on here but feel like we’ve been friends forever with how carefree, honest and vibrant you are! Being open to receive love from anywhere feels like such a gift to me as a bi-sexual. I’ve accepted also that my husband is truly the only man I’ll ever be attracted to or be with ever lololol I love him so much and he respects my fluidity of attraction and connection to everyone which is a big perk. Hopefully, your future partner does too!

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Ahh, Carrington! This makes me sooo happy! I'm glad hubby is accepting and all the things! If I do end up with a man long-term, I hope the same for myself!

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I love this. My family knew but ignored it because i ignored it. I didn't have to come out. I just stood in who I was.

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I love this for you boo!

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Jun 16Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

Felt like I was writing this myself because of how much I relate… especially with the whole “lack of coming out” thing. Thank you for this honest, beautiful piece!

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Thank you so much Chioma!

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What a beautiful essay, thank you for sharing!

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Thank you so much Janine!

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Jun 20Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

Your honesty and openness is inspiring!

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Thank you Michelle!!

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Jun 21Liked by Ashleigh Vaughn

So glad you shared this essay, what beautiful storytelling and meaningful perspective. Very happy I ended up here. Your ability to write with both directness and vulnerability is wonderful and I appreciate you sharing this experience with us.

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Thank you so very much, Zefan. Your words made my heart swell, truly.

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